How to choose the right dating site for professionals for you:
Before we even get to the many, many fish in the sea, we’ve got to work out which sea to fish in. Choosing the right dating site isn’t just about picking the flashiest app; it’s about finding the one that fits your personality, lifestyle and goals. Here’s how to reel in the right catch:
Ask around
If possible, ask friends how they met their partner. You might be surprised by how open people are about using dating apps nowadays. No shame in a little intel. Alternatively, turn to the internet’s wisdom — Reddit is full of real talk on dating app success rates. Determine which platform works best for your city and age group, as it can vary significantly.
Try before you buy
Don’t commit to an expensive subscription straight away. Flirt with the free trial first — it’s a risk-free way to see if the app is worth your time and cash. Otherwise, you risk falling into the sunk cost fallacy and sticking with something that isn’t right for you. We also recommend trying two apps if you have the time (and energy), so you can compare which feels like the best fit.
Know what you’re looking for
What’s your ideal age range? Relationship type? Non-negotiable traits? Dating is kind of like a business deal — don’t waste your time pursuing matches who are completely outside your criteria. Know what matters most to you and stick to it.
Create a detailed profile
Give people a real sense of who you are. Fill in prompts, interests, and your dating goals. A good profile is an upfront investment that saves you hours later. Avoid the trap of going for just ‘funny’ — use this space to market yourself authentically.
“It is important to complete your profile with honesty,” says Dr Suglani, ” as your brain’s natural bias is to present an idealised version of yourself. In relationships, however, incongruence between who you are and how you present yourself often leads to dissatisfaction.”
Values over traits
Dr Suglani advises prioritising values over superficial traits. “From a psychological standpoint, value alignment predicts long-term relationship success more reliably than shared hobbies or physical attraction alone.”
Think deeper — compatibility isn’t just about your shared love of brunch, it’s about shared life goals and values.
Stay open
“Our brains are wired to seek instant gratification, but meaningful compatibility takes time to reveal itself,” Dr Suglani explains. “Letting conversations unfold gives your nervous system the space to build safety and trust, which form the foundation of real intimacy. Remember that relationships reflect our inner world, so there is always learning involved along the way.”
Meaningful connections often take patience. Don’t expect sparks in the first message; instead, see it as a process.
Slow swiping
“It’s easy to browse profiles while multitasking, but the most aligned matches happen when you pause,” Brown urges. “Use your ‘off’ time — whether it’s a flight, lunch break, or slow Sunday — to read profiles with care. Ask yourself: ‘How do I feel when I view their profile? Would I want to share my time and energy with this person?’ Slow dating does not have to mean boring. It’s wise, especially when your energy is already in high demand.”
Swipe thoughtfully rather than reflexively. Quality beats quantity every time.
Make space, not just time
“It can feel really vulnerable to keep putting yourself out there–like going to many job interviews but not finding the right opportunity yet,” Brown shares. “That could mean replying to messages mindfully or planning a meaningful date. If you create space in your heart, and not just your schedule, you’ll see a difference in the way you feel when you’re connecting – less rushed and less pressure.”
Think of dating as something that deserves emotional space, not just calendar time. To get the most out of your time on dating apps, Dr Suglani recommends avoiding the urge to run on autopilot. Set aside moments to be fully present in conversations — it’ll pay off.
Follow