Kate Middleton once shocked the royal family by refusing an invitation from Queen Elizabeth after the monarch broke tradition to include Prince William’s then-girlfriend in a family gathering.

It was the holiday season of 2006 when the queen extended an invitation to Kate to join the royal family for Christmas lunch. Outsiders were typically not included in the family-centered event until they married into the House of Windsor.

In an excerpt from the book Battle of Brothers: William and Harry—The Inside Story of a Family in Tumult, as published by InStyle, it was surprising when Kate refused the monarch’s invite. Her decision raised eyebrows, as the engagement marked a rare break from royal tradition and would offer her a glimpse into the family holiday she had not yet been formally welcomed into.

“By 2006, [William and Kate] had been dating seriously for the best part of five years. Yet when William invited Kate to join him that year at Sandringham for the royal family’s traditional Christmas lunch, she refused,” wrote the book’s author, Robert Lacey.

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“It was the first time the Queen had extended such an invitation to an unregistered ‘girlfriend,’ but Kate had her own take on that break with tradition: she would go to Sandringham on Christmas Day only when she was engaged and had a ring to prove it. The strong-willed ‘no’ from Kate showed she was willing to abide by tradition and wait until the time was right. She was not prepared to stamp over history in her rush to marry into the royal family,” Lacey concluded.

Kate would not spend the holidays at Sandringham with other senior royals until after her marriage to William in April 2011. The same was true of her mother-in-law, the late Princess Diana, who didn’t share the holidays with the family until after her 1981 wedding to then-Prince Charles.

One other royal girlfriend was invited, and accepted

In December 2017, just one month after their engagement, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle received a special invitation from Queen Elizabeth for Meghan to join the royal family for the holidays. She accepted.

According to Marie Claire, Meghan’s appearance at the festivities broke tradition. However, in the same goodwill gesture she extended to Kate Middleton 11 years prior, the queen wanted the future royal family member to feel welcome.

Per HELLO!, Harry said the holiday went well. “The family loved having her there. There’s always that family part of Christmas [where] there’s always that work element there as well, and I think together we had an amazing time. We had great fun staying with my brother and sister-in-law and running ’round with the kids. Christmas was fantastic.”

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry spent two Christmases at Sandringham in 2017 and 2018, before announcing their decision to step back from their roles as senior royals. Today, Kate Middleton and Prince William continue to keep to the family tradition with their three children, Prince George, Princess Charlotte, and Prince Louis.

This story was originally published by Parade on Dec 29, 2025, where it first appeared in the News section. Add Parade as a Preferred Source by clicking here.