Prime minister’s questions: a shouty, jeery, very occasionally useful advert for British politics. Here’s what you need to know from the latest session in POLITICO’s weekly run-through.

What they sparred about: The prime minister’s future in No 10. Keir Starmer’s political future was the only show in town (despite a dreadful week for the BBC), handing Tory Leader Kemi Badenoch a wide-open goal.

If you’ve got a life outside SW1: The PM’s allies briefed multiple journalists Tuesday evening that Starmer expected — and would fight — a leadership challenge. Wes Streeting was accused of plotting a coup if the budget landed badly, something the health secretary flatly condemned during his well-received media round this morning (awkward timing).

Ticked off the register: To be fair, Labour whips turned out their flock, with the government benches packed to the rafters despite reports some Labour MPs would boycott the Commons. Starmer entered the chamber with a grin (or grimace) on his face and to a somewhat over-the-top cheer from his colleagues.

Caveat alert: There was no sign of Streeting in the chamber because he was in Manchester to address the NHS Providers Conference — and possibly grab some tips from Labour leadership wannabe and Greater Manchester Mayor Andy Burnham?

Grab the hazmat suit: Badenoch quoted Streeting’s comments today, asking if the health secretary was right that the “toxic culture in Downing Street” needed to change. Distancing himself from his allies, Starmer stressed, “let me be absolutely clear — any attack on any member of my cabinet is completely unacceptable.” The PM praised Streeting’s work as health secretary — presumably as that’s where he’d like him to stay.

Buck stops here: The Tory leader joked there was “only one waiting list” Streeting wanted to cut (it’s the way she tells ’em), before probing the PM on if he had full confidence in his influential Chief of Staff, Morgan McSweeney. “Of course I’ve never authorised attacks on cabinet members,” Starmer responded. “I appointed them to their posts because they’re the best people to carry out their jobs.”

Take note: That was not a full-throated defense of the adviser who has defined Starmer’s time in charge of Labour. Chief Whip Jonathan Reynolds and Commons Leader Alan Campbell seemed, at best, glum, as the Tories soaked up the infighting opposite them rather than within their own ranks (for now).

Walk in the park: Badenoch didn’t need to try hard to exploit the difficulties.  “The real scandal is that two weeks from a budget, the government has descended into civil war,” she cried. Starmer pointed at his backbenchers and remarked, “this is a united team and we are delivering together,” to roars of derision from the opposition benches. Indeed, saying something is true doesn’t make it so.

Helpful backbench intervention of the week: Ashford MP Sojan Joseph pointed the finger at the Reform UK-led Kent County Council, where numerous councilors have left or been expelled. Starmer was temporarily on the front foot, offering sympathy to “the people of Kent, whose lives are being disrupted by the staggering incompetence of Reform.” That’s the dividing line he’d rather be discussing.

Bursting the Westminster bubble: Clwyd North MP Gill German also asked if the PM wanted to join her on a visit to the Welsh seaside town of Rhyl. “That’s a very appealing invitation just at the moment,” he joked. You don’t say …

Totally unscientific scores on the doors: Starmer 5/10. Badenoch 8/10. The uphill struggle for Starmer was always going to be tricky, given the political gunfire over the last 24 hours. The political vulnerabilities were handed to Badenoch, who went on the attack. Starmer’s inability to fully back Sweeney was revealing, while claiming unity jarred so much with reality that it only reinforced the claim that the PM lacks any political instinct.