It’s impossible not to fall a little bit in love with Ariana Grande in Wicked. As Galinda (and later simply Glinda), Grande is an explosion of quirky charm across the screen. From the very first hair toss, it’s a playful, witty, physical performance with buckets of a certain old Hollywood type of comedic charisma. That bizarre Transatlantic accent will always get me. But none of this detracts from the glaring fact: Glinda kind of sucks.
Because let’s face it: from her mean girl origins in film one to her bad allyship in the second film, for most of the story, Glinda is “good” only when it suits her own interests. Yes, we love Grande’s performance, yes, we love her unlikely friendship with Cynthia Erivo’s Elphaba, and, yes, she does pull through in the end. But, nonetheless, Glinda is kind of the worst – and even though we may love her and even forgive her, we should be able to, firstly, understand why she is the way she is, and, secondly, call her out on it.
Universal Pictures
1. She’s kind of a mean girl
From her first moments at Shiz University, Glinda establishes herself as the school’s Queen Bee. Behind her warm smile, there always lurks a sinister, veiled threat: don’t get any ideas about actually being my friend. You can see it when she talks down to Boq (Ethan Slater). You can see it when she first meets Elphaba. Instead of treating Elphaba like, you know, a human being, she takes it upon herself to proclaim her “goodness” by promising to change her skin colour “problem” once she has learned magic.
Glinda becomes a full-on bully in the scenes that follow, making catty, sly comments in class (“It seems the artichoke is steamed.”) and cruelly giving Elphaba her ugly, old pointed hat, knowing it will make Elphaba look stupid in front of the rest of the school. She is in full Regina George mode.
Universal Pictures
2. She has the worst priorities
Glinda’s number one priority? Well, herself. Namely, getting ahead. As she proudly explains to Elphaba in “Popular” her one ambition is personal success – not because she wants to do anything with her power, but because she simply craves power for power’s sake. Her ambition to join Madame Morrible’s (Michelle Yeoh) sorcery seminar comes from the very same impulse. We never know why Glinda wants fame or what she wants to use it for — merely that she wants it.
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