Meghan Markle and Princess Kate were both “crying their eyes out” after an argument about bridesmaids’ dresses, according to a royal biography that differs from Meghan’s own account.

The Duchess of Sussex told Oprah Winfrey in 2021 that a major turning point in coverage of her by the British press came with an article suggesting she had made Kate cry.

In fact, Meghan argued, the reverse was true and Kate had made her cry and apologized later with a bunch of flowers.

Now a new biography, Yes, Ma’am: The Secret Life of Royal Servants, by Tom Quinn, has offered an alternative perspective on the incident. It has not been confirmed by either side.

A royal staff member was quoted in the book saying: “I can tell you that all the papers and commentators got this wrong, the truth is that as with many of these spats between sisters, brothers or even sisters-in-law, both sides were really upset.”

“The truth is that during the discussions about the bridesmaid’s dress Meghan said a few things she regretted and Kate said a few things she later regretted, but it was all in the heat of the moment,” the staff member continued. “Both women were crying their eyes out!”

Meghan Markle’s Account to Oprah Winfrey

The account directly contradicts Meghan’s version to Winfrey, in which she said Kate had later apologized: “The reverse happened. And I don’t say that to be disparaging to anyone, because it was a really hard week of the wedding.

“And she was upset about something, but she owned it, and she apologized. And she brought me flowers and a note, apologizing. And she did what I would do if I knew that I hurt someone, right, to just take accountability for it.”

“A few days before the wedding,” Meghan continued, “she was upset about something pertaining—yes, the issue was correct—about flower-girl dresses, and it made me cry, and it really hurt my feelings.”

Prince Harry’s Account in Spare

Harry went into more detail, suggesting Kate had called Meghan days before the wedding to say Princess “Charlotte’s dress is too big, too long, too baggy. She cried when she tried it on at home.”

According to Harry, Meghan replied: “Right, and I told you the tailor has been standing by since 8 a.m. Here. At KP [Kensington Palace]. Can you take Charlotte to have it altered, as the other moms are doing?”

“No, all the dresses need to be remade,” Kate said.

Harry wrote: “Her own wedding dress designer agreed, Kate added. Meg asked if Kate was aware of what was going on right now. With her father.

“Kate said she was well aware, but the dresses. ‘And the wedding is in four
days!'”

“A short time later I arrived home and found Meg on the floor. Sobbing,” he continued.

“I was horrified to see her so upset, but I didn’t think it a catastrophe. Emotions were running high, of course, after the stress of the last week, the last month, the last day. It was intolerable—but temporary. Kate hadn’t meant any harm, I told her.”

Later in the book, he described Harry and Meghan meeting Prince William and Kate to discuss press coverage that accused Meghan of making Kate cry: “Kate got things rolling straightaway by acknowledging that these stories in the papers about Meg making her cry were totally false. ‘I know, Meghan, that I was the one who made you cry.’

“I sighed. Excellent start, I thought. Meg appreciated the apology, but wanted to know why the papers had said this, and what was being done to correct them?”

‘A Storm in a Teacup’

The staff member quoted in the new biography told Quinn the whole saga had been blown out of proportion in the media: “Whenever this sort of thing happens in the royal family, traditionally no one says anything publicly about it so it rarely reaches the media, but on this occasion all sorts of other grievances meant that what was really nothing but a storm in a teacup reached the media and became a big issue.

“The other thing people forget is that when a private royal argument or row reaches the media, it gets subtly altered and usually made more significant than it really is.

“But even the royals tend to believe what they read in the newspapers if it suits them, so the incident with the bridesmaid’s dress became a kind of marker for all the other problems that Meghan had with Kate and with William and other members of the family.”

Jack Royston is chief royal correspondent for Newsweek, based in London. You can find him on X, formerly Twitter, at @jack_royston and read his stories on Newsweek’s The Royals Facebook page.

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